Blood and Lust
by Anata-chan
Summary: [REVAMPED] Summary: Have you ever had that empty feeling in your gut? Do you ever wonder where it comes from? Rin does, and she's about to find out.
1. Prologue

Author's note: Alright, I know, I _know_....It's taken forever, and all I've done is rewritten what I had. Well, that's what _you_ think. So, what I've done here is basically changed how the whole story was written. I'm also changing character development a bit. I'm not happy with how I developed Rin's character (and her age is slightly altered), so that shan't be the same. I hope you all will bear with me.

Life. Such a small word, yet it holds so much complication. Perhaps it is just meant to confuse us lowly humans and toy with our minds. Or, perhaps there is a greater meaning. If there is a way to tell, there are few who have discovered the secret.

-

The wolves howled at the brightness interrupting the black of night. Trees whispered their secrets to one another as the wind brushed through their tangled vines. The night was calm and cool; nothing seemed out of place. Even the most cautious of creatures slept soundly. After all, what could disturb them in this, Gaia's haven? The Mother watched over her creatures, guarding her precious children. Normally, she wouldn't compromise the safety of her loved ones, but tonight – tonight, something wandered through her woods and caught her heart.

The little creature was foreign to her; none had passed before that looked so strange. It hobbled on two feet, falling nearly constantly. Dirt and tracks of water stained what appeared to be its face and what the Mother supposed were its eyes were large and hollow.

Sadness rolled off the creature in waves; it was apparent that something terrible had befallen this child. Yes, the Mother decided, this was a child, something that needed to be taken care of. She dropped a few vines and let them caress the tear-stained face of her new child, a comforting gesture. This only caused the little one to again stumble and fall. This time, it did not get up.

The Mother sighed her concern in a soft breeze and wrapped a warm blanket of air around her new daughter to help her rest.

Previously... 

"Rei-chan! Come inside, it's getting dark! You'll catch cold!"

"Haaaaaaai!" The head of black hair swiveled and flew in the wind as the girl twirled on her heel and dashed barefooted toward the small hut. She ran her hand through the long, tangled locks and wiped her feet off on the mat before slipping inside and bowing to her father. "Otou-san, is Mama ready with supper? I've worked up an appetite keeping an eye on the animals."

Her father chuckled, the wrinkles around his eyes deepening with his kind smile. He opened his arms for a hug and kissed her forehead, tickling her skin with his graying beard. "Okaa-san is setting the table for us as we speak. Go wash up, Tenshi, and find your brother. Then we may eat."

The girl wrinkled her nose at him and frowned playfully. "You know I don't like being called that, Papa. I'm far from being an angel, and you know it." She kissed him on the cheek and skipped back out of the hut. Her father simply smiled lovingly and shook his head.

She slowed her pace as she neared the water pump. Her brother was already washing up, struggling to pump the water for himself. "Shuku, do you want some help?" She smiled to herself, knowing that he wanted to be a big boy and would deny any assistance she offered.

As predicted, the small boy whined at her. "Rei! I can do this myself!" He lifted the handle and tried to push it down again, but failed miserably.

She giggled and poked at his side. "I'm sure you can, but you're being too slow!" Her fingers began wiggling against his skin and he squirmed, filling the air with childish laughter as his sister tickled him incessantly. "Do you give in?"

He did his best to fend her off, but his small hands were no match for her larger ones. Age did have its advantage sometimes. "Alright! Alright, I give in! I need help."

The girl immediately stopped her attack and lifted him to his feet. "Well, then. Let's get cleaned up before Mama sends Papa out here to look for us!" The two giggled and splashed each other as they washed the dirt off of their faces and hands, but eventually managed to finish and dry themselves.

Later that night, the girl sat on the dirt floor by the window of the small room she shared with her brother. The air was cool and crisp, keeping her awake and slightly chilly. Something about the night drew her attention; everything was so beautiful out there. She had been cooped up in her little town all her life, and that was just the beginning.

A legend in her village of an ancient miko and a fearsome demon combining to create a powerful artifact somehow frightened her neighbors. The legend went that the miko had battled the great youkai and had sealed both herself and the youkai inside the relic. The battle continued inside, and any who touched the object would tip the fight one way or the other.

Only one could ever unseal their souls, and the legend would have it that the creature was a soulless god, one with a black heart and a taste for evil. It went that the god would touch the artifact and a great evil would be unleashed in the world, consuming all things good. The only description that could be had was that the god had a red crescent mark on its chest, above its collarbone, and that it would be reborn into human children.

The girl had the unfortunate luck to have been attacked by wolves when she was small. The wolves tore at her flesh and scarred the skin on top of her collarbone. The crescent wound had never completely healed and still burned every now and then, but always remained a vibrant, blood red color.

She sighed, absentmindedly bringing her hand to the mark that would forever haunt her. She would never be safe so long as the legend remained; she would always have to hide her scar.

Suddenly, she was so tired. The bedding on the floor looked so comfortable to her, and her brother's body would keep her warm in the cold night air. Yawning, she crawled toward it, slid underneath the blankets, and let herself drift off into a dreamless slumber.

Not more than two hours later, the door to the small bedroom was shoved open, the girl's father pulling the blankets off of his two children. "Wake up!" was all his hoarse voice could manage.

Two pairs of eyes fluttered open and two pairs of hands subsequently rubbed at them. "What's going on, Papa? Are wolves attacking the herd again?"

"Tenshi..." Her father wet his lips and clenched his eyes tightly shut. "Tenshi, you must get out of here. Now."

"Papa, it's late. What's going on?"

The girl put a reassuring hand on her brother's shoulder. "Shuku, sit up and put on a coat." In less than two minutes, the two siblings were dressed and completely awake. "I am ready, Papa."

The man's face seemed to have aged decades in the few short hours since they had eaten. His eyes were tired and sad, wrinkles were forming on his forehead in worry. "Good. Your mother has packed you some food. The two of you are to run into the forest and wait there. I do not want either of you coming back here until either your mother or I come and get you." He paused for a shaky breath. "There is a tree at the top of the hill next to the stream. It has a hollow on the far side, beneath the roots. The villagers will not find you there."

So that was what this was about. The villagers knew. Her shirt had probably torn while she was out playing yesterday and one of the boys must have seen it. Mama had always told her not to play with the boys, but she never listened. "Act like the woman you almost are," Mama always said. Far be it for her to actually have listened.

She hugged her father and took her brother's hand. "Don't forget, Papa. You promised you'd come get us; don't forget." She rushed out of the room, brother in tow, before he could answer her. Her mother handed her a basket and her brother a blanket before kissing them both.

"Remember," she whispered, "we love you both very much."

Goodbye... 

The two siblings rushed out of the little hut and pushed their way past the herd of animals and around the small garden of herbs and carrots. The walk to the stream would have been nearly half an hour, but they ran. Their feet crashed on the soft earth beneath them and rocks sliced into the flesh, causing blood to drip steadily into the dirt. It took many minutes, but they finally made it.

They looked down the hill behind them at their village, when the girl suddenly had a deep pain in her chest. Torches were lit and a crowd of people trailed from her house and into the village. Her home was on fire, and she could hear the screams of her mother.

Her breath shook and she stumbled back a few steps in shock. All of this...because of her. "Sh..Shuku...They..."

His hand gripped hers almost painfully. "Nee-chan...Mama to Papa..." He suddenly ripped his hand from hers and ran, tumbling, down the hill.

"Shuku! No!" The girl dropped the basket she had been carrying, the weave splintering on a large rock in the grass. She began to run after him, reaching out for him. _Please, don't go there...I can't lose everyone..._

Her breathing stopped. Time slowed. Everything seemed to spin around her, bringing her to her knees.

Blood seeped from the stump that had once been her brother's neck. His eyes seemed to stare up at her from his severed head, pleading with her to help him, do something, anything.

She didn't know how she managed it, but she was running, running, through the woods, across the stream. Her soaked clothing caught dirt as it flew up with the wind and her frantic steps. Empty tears streamed down her cheeks and the wind burned her eyes.

They were all dead.

-

The Mother gently caressed her child's cheek, soothing and comforting. Perhaps a good night's sleep was all she needed.


	2. Chapter One

A/N: All right, here's chapter 1 rewritten! Go me, it's fixed! Maybe this fic will actually be worth reading now… Oh well. Have fun, folks! And, by the way, her name is not currently "Rin" (but you may notice that I don't write her name often, or at all) but I assure you, she _is_ Rin. If you're confused, bear with me. You'll understand in the next couple of chapters.

___-pov-_: POV/Scene angle change (focusing on one person to focusing on another) ff.n is being a bitch and deleting all of my separations in the document manager, so it'll have to stay as this.

_The ruler/line: Scene change (one time to another or one place to another)_

Understanding is something that the wise say comes with age, but true enlightenment waits for no one.

* * *

When the sun arose, the girl could barely think. Everything about the day before was just a fog of images; nothing stood out in her mind except a pair of eyes.

Her brother's eyes.

She sat up straight and stiff, breathing in a sharp, shallow breath. It hadn't been a dream. Her family was gone, and she had no one. Her heart spasmed in agony as she realized just how alone she was. She was barely a woman and on her own. It was doubtful that she'd even survive for more than a few days.

Then again, did she really want to?

She shook her head. How could she go on? Her father, her mother, Shuku…His face would forever haunt her. She didn't know how the people she had grown up with could be so cruel. The villagers…was it possible that they had really murdered her family? They were always so kind and caring; the elders always seemed so wise, and they always took care of everyone.

Reminiscing was getting her nowhere fast. She dug her nails in the dirt and leaned heavily against the tree she had slept beneath. The long, thin strands of leaves waved gently in the summer breeze. How could the day be so happy?

She held her breath and tightened her chest for a moment. She had to stop remembering; she needed to get out of this forest and find a way to survive. She wouldn't let their deaths be in vain, and she would find a way to set their souls to rest. Eventually, things would be as right as they possibly could.

* * *

The chilled water stiffened her muscles, but felt so wonderful on the torn skin of her feet and the scratches that graced her skin. The forest was beautiful, but bare feet and arms weren't a way to keep healthy. She rubbed at the irritated skin, trying to remove the caked dirt and dried blood. She winced and hissed in pain when one of them started bleeding again. "That one must've been deeper than I thought."

Once she was satisfied that her cuts and bruises weren't going to be too much trouble, she began rubbing at her face and scratching her scalp while putting her head under the water of the stream. The filth that clung to her was maddening, and she scrubbed with her fingers and hands until she could no longer feel her face. She sighed, calming her frenzied actions. 'I can't become so obsessed with everything else so I forget…I'll end up driving myself insane.'

The air as she got out of the stream was cool and wracked chills through her body. Her muscles protested as she bent them to pick up her filthy clothing and bring them to the stream to wash them. They were stained with mud, grass, and blood and would soon be worthless. It was all she could do to keep them from falling apart when she dipped them in the cold water.

_-pov-_

His eyes watched the naked figure dipping and scrubbing the torn and ragged cloth as he crouched in the bushes. What was she doing here? This was his territory, and he couldn't be certain that this little human woman wasn't a danger to his clan. And, if she was…

…well, Ginta, at least, would definitely enjoy her.

The fangs in his mouth grazed his lower lip as she began to stand. Her long black hair fell against her back and stuck to the skin with a wet slap. Although he would normally be brazen and simply kill the wench, there might be others, and he didn't need another angry village after his pack. The last time that had happened was years before, and the human-child they had taken got away with only one scar, leaving his pack less two wolves from the blades of the humans. He sighed; there was no other choice but to follow her until he had decided if she was a threat, one way or another. Scratching his nose lightly, he set back to wait.

* * *

She had been wandering aimlessly for what had to have been days. Eventually, her legs could no longer support her malnourished body and they simply gave out. That left her stranded on a large root on the edge of a small clearing covered in grass. Hydrangea petals littered the ground, some dancing slightly in the wind. Although the view was beautiful, her eyes could barely focus on the ground directly in front of her. Her body nearly cried out for sleep and sustenance, keeping her from continuing her journey.

She had been walking in circles, anyway.

A frustrated sob filled the air, followed by a dull _thump_. Her shoulders hunched over as they shook with the force of her cries, her arm lifting as much as it could and slamming back into the ground. "Why? Why is all this happening to me?" Her voice cracked slightly and ended in a high-pitched squeak. The force of her emotions destroyed the last of her strength and her torso fell to the dirt. Things couldn't possibly get any worse.

Oh how wrong she realized she was as she stared into the eyes of a large man. Her own eyes widened in shock and fear, muscles tensing and preparing to use whatever strength they might have left to push her up and run as far and as fast as she could. A look of pure, unadulterated terror settled on her face, her open mouth ready to emit a powerful scream. All that she managed to get out was a dry, soft cry of "Ookami!"

_-pov-_

Kouga tilted his head at her antics. Her fright was pungent in the air, overloading his senses. He doubted that she had the strength to run, but if she did, his love for the hunt would overwhelm him. He wouldn't be held responsible for the consequences. When he had had first discovered the little human woman-child wandering his forest, he had hardly believed that she was in his territory; even more, he didn't think she would be foolish enough to _remain_ there. He _had_ thought them smart enough to avoid battles with demons, but that must have been a misconception.

As he processed his thoughts on the creature in front of him – dinner, pet, or otherwise – Kouga took in her tattered, filthy appearance. No, maybe he had been right about humans not being stupid enough to get into another inter-species war; maybe this girl was a sacrifice. She didn't look to be worth much to a village of farmers, but she was, under all of that caked dirt, fairly pretty…for a human. Perhaps he would give her to his pack until they were through with her, then feed her to his wolf-brethren. Yes, he decided, this would do nicely. "Up," he barked, letting a low, threatening growl resonate in his chest.

All the woman-child did in response was stare up at him, terrified. This would not do. Although the fear seeping into the air made his senses run wild, Kouga did _not_ have time for this nonsense. His growl grew from a low rumble to a loud roar, startling her and making her flinch. He smirked when the girl stumbled backward, completing half of a backwards somersault and landing on her back.

"I said 'Up.'"

She whimpered, but, obviously sensing that obeying him was the only way she would get out of this situation unharmed, she shakily put a hand underneath her. As she curled her legs under her, trying to force them to hold her weight, he studied her. Fairly young, but definitely of breeding age – he'd have to watch that; he didn't want the pack to spawn any hanyou filth in the event that she proved a decent pet and was kept – with full, perky breasts and a slender figure. She wasn't tall, which was good. He didn't want her to try intimidating any of the younger males; although, from the looks of her, she wouldn't try anything so stupid just yet. Yes, she would make a fine pet, until the boys used her up.

Hopefully, if she proved worthy, the sustenance they would provide her with would help her last a bit. Kouga hated having to deal with the butting males when they didn't have a pet on whom they could vent their sexual and physical frustrations.

* * *

The wolf den was surprisingly cozy.

She never would have thought it, but she almost wanted to stay there in the stone cave with the soft-looking pelt-beds. They were much nicer than she had ever seen, and it even looked like some of the skins might have been wildcat. For a split second, that surprised her – who would be foolish enough to hunt a wildcat, after all? – until she remembered that this was the home of a wolf pack. Of course, dog hunts cat. She should have been feeling the cat, but the ookami leader – she assumed he was the leader, at least – hadn't done anything to her since he found her; all he had done was throw her over his shoulder and drag her to his pack, and they hadn't started attacking her yet. Maybe they wouldn't at all. Maybe they would let her live. Maybe they would help her. Maybe…

"Oi, onna. Stop daydreaming and get your sorry ass over here."

Maybe not.

She bit her lip and moaned inwardly as her little bit of misplaced hope was squelched. This would be no better than wandering alone in the woods, she was sure of that. In the woods, at least, she wasn't surrounded by vicious, bloodthirsty youkai. She quickly stole a glance farther into the cavern and shivered as she saw nothing but darkness and eyes staring back at her; why hadn't she noticed that before? Aware that her original captor was eyeing her, still waiting for her to continue following him, she lowered her gaze and urged her sore and malnourished muscles to shuffle her forward. The only way she was going to get out of this alive was to do as she was told…at least, for now.

_-pov-_

Kouga waited for the human to take the few steps needed to reach him; waited patiently, he might add. But when the little bitch simply did not obey, he growled and walked to her. He didn't like it when he was ignored. The vice-like grip he took on her upper arm told her so. Who was he to know that she had been trying? Who was he to care? He roughly shoved her forward into the darkness of the den, growling a low command to a young female of the pack. Not but seconds later, the lights in the cave were lit, and a warm hearth flickered gaily in the background.

"Nee, Kouga, what have you brought us? Dinner?"

"Do not overstep your place, Akima. Kouga-sama will tell us when he is ready. Until then, pup, keep your mouth."

Kouga smiled at this sharp rebuke and softly barked an approval at the female, likely to win in a fight against the others for the alpha position when the time came. Perhaps he would take her as a mate. The female bowed her head and smiled a pleasured, wicked smile. She was cocky. Perhaps he would have to fix that.

He huffed and mentally shook himself out of his thoughts and on to more pressing matters. He practically threw the human woman, now pet, at the younger female who he had told to light the hearth and candles. She caught the new pet with ease, supporting her when her legs gave out. "Migure, see that she is fed. I will bring back a carcass for the rest of you." With that, he was, once again, gone.

It didn't take a telepath to realize that the pet was wondering if she'd now be fed her own limbs.

_-pov-_

Her eyes widened in terror as the wolf leader – for she was sure now that he was, in fact, the leader – left her in the care of his pack. If he hadn't fed them already, would they simply eat her? She had seen what wolves and wolf-youkai were capable of, and she didn't particularly want to relearn the process. The young wolf supporting her – Migure? – glared at the others, who were obviously eyeing her with a look of hunger…but she couldn't tell if it was from desire to eat her or something else. She decided that it was the unknown something else that scared her more. So, with muscles shaking from having to produce non-existent energy to support her, and with lungs spasming as she tried and failed to take steady breaths, she attempted to draw away from the wolf-girl.

The arms around her only tightened. Fearful of what would happen if she tried to retaliate, she simply let herself go lax in the arms of her new captor. When nothing painful happened, she looked up into the face of this Migure, and was surprised that the wolf-girl looked quite young, but far from innocent. Migure's eyes conveyed an eerie intelligence, something that unnerved her a great deal. She couldn't quite place it, but she didn't like the feeling that looking at these eyes gave her.

Migure easily shifted her so that she was no longer dragging her limbs across the ground and carried her to a soft pelt-covered cushion. The wolf-girl turned around and stepped into the shadows of the cave, disappearing except for a bushy little tail. Tail? None of the others had a tail, so why did Migure? She couldn't quite comprehend, but decided that, just maybe, she didn't want to.

When the other girl returned and set a small platter of, thankfully, cooked meat in front of her, she just stared at it. What if they'd poisoned it? But wait…youkai wouldn't go to all that trouble just to kill a human girl. If they'd wanted her dead, she would be long dead and eaten. She shuddered and wondered just who was on her plate.

"It's wild goat, bitch. You're lucky that Kouga is feeding you at all."

Migure's strange silver eyes spoke command beyond the youthful expression she wore. The wolf-girl glared at the offending orator, but eventually returned to stare at her, silently, but powerfully, commanding her to eat. She couldn't help but obey, so long as those ghostly orbs focused on something other than herself. With as much self-restraint as she could muster, she picked up the meat, put it to her mouth, and ripped off a small bite. After so many days without sustenance, eating this too fast would likely make her ill. So, she chewed slowly, enjoying the first taste of real food she had had in days, possibly a week. It felt buttery on her tongue, the fat attached to the meat having oozed its oil into the meat while it cooked. She licked her lips.

At this point, she didn't even notice Migure's uncanny stare; all that mattered was this meat. It was her life; without it, she would fly away to the land of the dead, she felt sure of that. The heaven that was her first meal with the wolves lasted for what seemed years, but what must have been mere minutes. When she had finished, Migure put a small saucer of water in front of her. The cool liquid was pure joy, soothing her parched throat and cooling her from the inside out. She shivered, but this time it was not at all unpleasant.

The sensation was short-lived. Her euphoria was abruptly brought to a halt when Migure lightly yanked her to her feet and dragged her outside of the cave, past all of the unnerving eyes that she had momentarily been able to forget. Her legs were still weak, but she no longer stumbled and fell when the other girl dragged her down the steep slope toward the bottom of the mountain in which the den was located. She winced when her still-raw feet scraped against the stone and dirt, but Migure didn't falter in her fast pace. It wasn't until they reached level ground that their pace slowed to a brisk walk. She padded along behind the wolf-girl as lightly as she could, trying to be mindful of her sore and, once again, bleeding feet.

Soon enough, thankfully, the other girl halted, giving her a view of a grand spring. She was hoping that she guessed right and that Migure had led her here to bathe. And, Goddess be praised, she was right. She was aware that she would have no chance of privacy, so she didn't bother asking and just removed her tattered and filthy garments. After doing so, she stepped into the surprisingly warm water and let her sore muscles soak in the heat and relax. Hoping that Migure would let her remain her for a bit, she stretched out and didn't immediately start scrubbing. When she didn't hear a complaint, she heaved an inward sigh of relief and immersed herself completely in the water.

"Ahh…" It felt so good to be taking a warm bath again. Back home, it had been a luxury that she allowed herself only on days when she had extra time; it took a while to gather the wood and heat the water, but she never regretted it. Her breath hitched in her throat. Back home. Where it all had…

She was stripped out of her thoughts when a slight thump beside her caught her attention. There, to her right, was a small pile of chamomile and jasmine, along with other herbs and a mortar and pestle. Delighted, she looked up at Migure, hoping that these were for her. When the other girl merely stared glossily into her eyes, she looked away nervously and began scrubbing the filth from her body.

When that was done, she did the same with her hair and scalp. Picking up the grinding tool, she placed the plants into it and began working them into a pulp. After a few muscle-wrenching moments, she managed to grind it all, more than a little dismayed that she was still so weak. Then again, she realized, one meal after a week of starvation would not do much to bring her body back to its finest. So, forcing herself to be satisfied with what little improvement she had made, she wet her head again and began working the mixture into her hair and scalp.

It felt so delicious, tingling on her head. She had never felt so clean and refreshed in her life, and she relished every moment of it. Massaging her scalp delicately, she craned her neck and began washing away the herbal substance. She was nearly through when she was disturbed from her reverie by a decidedly male voice. Squawking loudly, she brought her arms up to cover her chest and shoved her body deeper into the spring.

When she saw who it was, she had to fight with all of her will to choke on her much-needed outburst of "hentai!" It took much effort, but she managed to avoid shouting the insult, however true she felt it was.

_-pov-_

Kouga smirked. The new pet was obviously trying very hard to keep its tongue, and he liked that. He would enjoy breaking her, and was glad that there was still some fight left in the body that, just hours ago, had been nearly dead. His smirk turned into a full-blown lecherous grin. "Get out of the pool and put this on." He deliberately set the plain brown pants and white top on the ground out of her reach and awaited her reaction.

The incredulous look upon her face was reward enough for him, but he continued waiting for her to remove herself from the water and dress. "I am not patient, and you would be loathe to have me dress you myself, human." His smile exhibited his long, sharp fangs, and he heard her fearful gulp. Oh, how he loved this game. It took but a moment longer, and she was pulling herself out of the water, still covering her chest, but unable to cover any more. Truthfully, her body didn't interest him so much as her reaction to his presence and command. He was the alpha male of a wolf pack and naturally dominant. Her fear and embarrassment inspired him in so many ways. Yes, he would enjoy breaking her a great deal.

_-pov-_

She couldn't believe it! He was degrading her like she was no more than a common slave! Hah. She mentally smacked herself. She _was_ no more to him than a common slave. Covering as much of her breasts as she could, she walked quickly to the clothes that the youkai had dropped for her. Keeping one arm on her chest at all times, she struggled into the pants, attempting to tie them with only one hand. That didn't work too well, so she quickly dropped her other hand, tied them, and reached for the shirt. It was halfway on when she heard a loud, terrifying growl.

Looking over to the inhuman sound, she noticed that the youkai's eyes were focused…on the scar above her collarbone.

"You…" the feral voice snarled. "The child that cause the death of my kinsmen…"

Instinct took over, and all she could do was run.

A/N: Okay, so this was a fairly long chapter! Yay. I actually did this in one day, but it just takes me forever to get around to writing. So, hopefully I'll get around to revamping/writing (I don't think it can really be considered revamping…the old story is now more like an outline) the next chapter soon.

Hmm…for all you Kouga fans, don't expect to see much of him, at least for a while. When/if he comes back, he'll be more of the Kouga you know and love.

Until next time, minna-san! -Anata


End file.
